By Rachael Tvrdy
Director of Family Life and Discipleship
Summertime is around the bend, and it’s the ideal season for families to slow down and relax into longer and slower days. Yet for many families, summer is anything but relaxing. In fact, it can become more hectic than the school year as parents scramble to find activities to fill days that are no longer structured in a classroom. Kids can no longer be bored, and constantly are looking to parents to keep them entertained. Parents feel that strain more than ever, and often turn to devices to take the edge off.
Whatever happened to those “lazy, hazy days of summer?”
We live in an age of exhaustion. Our culture has forgotten how to truly recover and rest. Our “downtime” is often filling our breaks with scrolling, answering emails during dinner, or listening to podcasts while driving. Worse still, we often feel guilty when we do rest – as if we should be doing something more productive instead.
Josef Pieper, in his classic book, “Leisure: The Basis of Culture”, writes: “True culture does not come from work. It comes from leisure.” According to Pieper, leisure is not simply the absence of work; it is the ability to learn how to slow way down and receive life as a gift, rather than trying to constantly optimize, produce, and achieve more.
Even writing these words feels somewhat un-American. Americans are driven by motivation, success metrics, and performance. We often pride ourselves on how much we accomplish in any given day. If you look at other cultures (such as Mediterranean, African, or Central/South American cultures), they seem to naturally embrace the rhythm of slow living. There is something deeply human about the pace of the old world, which encourages days to unwind rather than fast-forward through. And I believe it is written into the human heart to long for that lifestyle which is oriented toward community, joy, and beauty.
So practically, how do we do it? First, we must start by unplugging from what’s virtual, and plug into the reality around us: What beauty surrounds us right now? What goodness is present in our day? What truth is God speaking into our conversation with others or moments of silence alone with Him? Leisure starts with noticing.
Secondly, we must also learn to reject pressure. Pressure is the undercurrent beneath so much of our culture’s frenetic pacing. It often drives our schedules and bodies into burnout. It often asks us: What is your output? What is your value? What are you producing?
Unfortunately, this mentality trickles down to children from a very early age. Their schedules are packed with extracurriculars, sports, and constant stimulation. Unstructured play in evenings and on weekends is progressively dwindling. Parents often lament that their children cannot sit still or that they are constantly in the pick-up line or driving kids around. But perhaps the deeper question is this: Have we accepted or resigned ourselves to a way of living that leaves no room for true leisure?
Third, we need to be deliberate and creative. Leisure does not call us to be passive or idle, but to be actively intentional and integrated with our time. That means, no rushing, no multi-tasking, and to be fully present. It teaches us how to reorder our lives and to not get swept up into the “go, go, go” mentality. Oftentimes, the way we resist is by saying no. No to overscheduling. No to limitless screen time. No to the pressure to keep up with the Joneses.
In truth, the simpler and less filled our lives, the more space we have for real connection. For some, it may be reclaiming family dinner or creating community by dining al fresco (in the open air) and intentionally asking about each person’s day. For another, it may be making an intention to walk after dinner as a family, praying a rosary through your neighborhood, or sipping drinks on the front porch. Or, it may look like appreciating nature through catching the sunset, picnics at a park, cloud watching, camping, and catching fireflies at night.
The opportunities are endless because God’s truth, beauty, and goodness is ever surrounding us.
And if we don’t slow down, we might miss it. For a list of ideas for family leisure this summer, please visit our Family Life webpage.
