“Manners,” by Aliki
1990, reprinted by Scholastic Press, New York, 32 pages, Grades 2-4.
At one time in the United States, men would never have thought of eating a meal without removing their hat. Many men today seem to have no clue that they would have formerly been considered rude for this behavior.
Common courtesies seem to be in decline as well. Why is this happening? If manners are an important part of the social fabric of a community, how can they be reintroduced? Aliki, a famous Greek-American author, has written a fine book on this very topic. Written for children, in this picture book she presents numerous examples of bad behavior and good behavior in social situations. Appropriately, she has named it, “Manners.”
The book begins with children making comments about an activity and other children responding. A young girl shows a boy a sailboat that she has constructed. Instead of saying something positive about her effort, the boy rudely tells her that the boat will never sail. Another boy tells the girl that the boat must have taken a great deal of time to build. This uplifting comment is then quickly counteracted by another child telling the girl that he has built a better sailboat. So in four simple pictures, readers see supportive comments as well as hurtful and selfish statements.
This is followed by another four-set picture frame of an accident. A child has fallen over backwards and is frightened and possibly hurt. A boy turns and tells the child to get up and stop crying. A girl then blames the child for the accident by telling her if she had sat on the chair properly in the first place, there would have been no accident. The final boy in the story rushes to the side of the injured child and offers assistance.
Aliki then begins to explain what manners are and why they are so necessary. She states that good manners help build friendships and help you get along with people. Manners are the actions that people take when they encounter any situation. When people respond with actions filled with charity and kindness their relationships with others improve. Good manners allow you to be thoughtful and polite with people. People with good manners are usually liked by others. The reason for this is simple, these people are kind and likeable, while people with bad manners tend to be rude and selfish.
Aliki goes through many different lessons on manners in this book. The lesson on “I’m Sorry” is very useful. How many people really know how to tell someone they are sorry for having done something hurtful? The example the author uses happens frequently on school playgrounds. One child runs into a girl while hurrying to catch up with a friend. The injured child cries out in pain and tells the thoughtless boy that he has no manners. At first, he does not want to say he is sorry for knocking the girl over. But the longer he talks with the injured child, the more remorseful he becomes. At the end of the story he says he is sorry and both children feel better. There are many more examples on developing good manners and not hurting the feelings of others throughout the book.
If you would like to introduce the topic of good manners to children, this is an excellent title. Aliki tells the reasons good manners are so important, and how children can develop them.
Aliki Liacouras Brandenberg is the full name of the author, but she has always simply used her first name Aliki as her pen name. I hope you take the chance to check this book out of the library. It is an excellent title to developing good behavior in children.
The reviewer would like to thank Andrew Winter and the entire Winter family for recommending this book. Thanks so much!
